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This page is inspired by the windows XP blue screen of death, so it needs lots of text:

Welcome, brave Irken soldiers. Welcome to Conventia, the convention hall planet. Please, proceed to the docking ring and take the complimentary teleporters to the planet's surface!

Be sure to visit the gift shop for all kinds of cheap, useless stuff!

If you're here for The Great Assigning, please remember where you parked and proceed to the main convention hall.